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carlytimberlake
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Name: Carly
Country: United States
State: Michigan
Metro: Detroit
Birthday: 8/29/1983
Interests: sleeping, mowing the lawn, pistons, cowboys, degrassi, art, music, italy, justin, bikes, trains, rivers
Expertise: balancing things, angles,cosmetology ,naps and eggs
Occupation: Student
Industry: Art
Message: message me
AIM:  carlottag11
Member Since:
6/26/2004
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| i'm interested in lots of things. vaguely. or should i say casually. i have a casual relationship with being interested in many things.but the one thing i'm really interested in is finding ways to maintain an at least mildly entertaining state of idleness. now that i think of it, it doesn't even have to be entertaining, just tolerable. yes, a tolerable state of idleness is what i desire, and it's especially desirable if you are idle enough to be unconscious of the idleness of the situation. the trick though, and it's one i think a can boast a mastery of, is to balance on that border of boredom. because boredom is no man's land, a stark and desperate place. but tolerable idleness, doing moslty nothing, but just enough something, that's where the magic is at.
i have my phD in wasting time.
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| Is Coldplay too pretentious for me to love anymore?
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| I wish not to misrepresent myself; my aim in life is simply to learn the choreography to Beyonce's "Put a Ring On It"
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| if i could have a job interview in the shower...i would. i'm not kidding. the naked part wouldn't even bother me, the interviewer wouldn't even notice because i am that brilliant in the shower. so confident, so many groundbreaking ideas, clarity like you can't fathom. i give some great monologues in the shower. make plans to save the planet. genius budget projections.
then i step out of my steamy cubicle...and have doubts that i'm qualified to tie my shoes.
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| it's annoying that today i am inspired by a borderline cheezy movie.. or atleast a movie that was meant to inspire in that new not so obvious so therefore very obvious way, but since i don't write on here doesnt mean i havent been inspired...it doesnt mean that, but yet I haven't. maybe because i avoid it because i find it too deliberate...or maybe this (and not maybe, now i know not maybe).....being in between reckless college abandonment age and adult black hole mode is a strange and difficult place to be, and i don't think just for me. you don't know how to be an adult yet, and being reckless and carefree...it doesn't fit, you feel like you're back in your hometown for a high school football game and embarrassed by how the kids are acting, mostly because it's how you know you acted. so instead of being one or the other, adult or i don't know, college age, you are an inbetweener. there is no identity to be had...so i think you fade, or just wait, or float...until you get some sign or being an adult seems natural and you want to contribute to your 401-k instead of splurging on a kick-ass trip to Florida for spring break. but maybe it doesnt come...i dont know, but what i think i know is i need to embrace who i am now, inbetween. i don't need to feel like i fit in my age appropriate box, i need to feel like me. i need to embrace my flaws and shortcomings and insecurites, not be pleased with myself for having them, but be pleased to understand that they help make me who i am...someone who doesn't know how to be a wife just yet, who can't stay up all night anymore, who hasn't been living a particularly inspired life as of late, who doesn't contribute to her 401-k but is very concerned with her deductible with her healthcare plan. it's ok to be in between, but it's not ok to ignore the fact that you're holding your breath until you've crossed the river.
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